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"Bed Bath and Beyond? No problem."
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Or to teach them how to fucking rule .
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For example, the potential here defies description.
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If this gives you paranoid visions of a future in which thousands of Tickle Me Elmo’s march past your house, outfitted with self aiming Mercenaries equipped with live ammo, rest assured that Zero Ops’ won’t sell it to any supervillains .
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Developed by the aptly named company Water Walking Ball, the water walking ball allows you to walk on water. in a ball. For $500.
"Our parents spent our college money and we’re going to drown! Hooray!"
Of course, that price tag is to buy your own ball. If you go to Water Walking Ball’s main location in Myrtle Beach, you can spend $10 to ride inside one for three minutes, which seems a little short until you read a little further on their webpage and realize that the balls can only hold about 30 minutes of breathable air, which effectively ruins our plan to have a Cracked editorial team footrace across the Atlantic Ocean.
Also, this could be a problem.
Still, despite the steep price tag and limited oxygen supply, "poor and suffocated" is how most of us are going to die anyway. Might as well do it in a giant hamster ball.
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