A couple of months ago,
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5. The Devil’s AdvocateI had a friend in school who was one of the sweetest, kindest dudes I’ve ever met. He was a mild mannered,
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Your Story: Oh,
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It really didn’t matter what the story was; it was always somehow your fault, especially in the service industry context mostly because Adam worked in a camping supplies retail store and hated everyone all the time (despite being so sweet and kind and seemingly mild mannered). Eventually,
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"Hey, I just got back from Burger King and they totally messed up my order,
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"Well," Adam replied, "did you have like a special order?"

Yes," I conceded. "I ordered my Whopper without onions."

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"Adam,
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"Well, y’know,
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"It’s not,
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For younger readers: It totes was. Totes. That’s what you kids say, right? Totes? Yeah,
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4. The True BelieverThe True Believer lets you tell your story. He might even laugh at all the right parts and listen patiently for the ending while you tell it. But that’s because he has a point to make. See, the True Believer is a devout Christian or an ardent vegan or a strict libertarian it doesn’t matter. He is a member of some belief that systematically runs through every single thing he does in his life. There is nothing,
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Your Story: . so anyway, I was just about to leave the shoe store because they didn’t have my size when a box fell off the shelf, nearly hitting me on the head. But when it hit the ground, the black Kenneth Coles I was looking for popped right out of the box. They’d been put back in the wrong spot,
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True Believer 1: Yep,
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True Believer 2: Yeah, fucking corporate America,
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